Why the Mumbai Attacks shouldn’t have surprised anyone

The story of why this attack was allowed to happen.

The latest Mumbai tragedy is the fourteenth terrorist attack on the city since 1993, raising the total terrorism-related death toll in the city to 701. With history repeating itself yet again, one has to wonder how many more attacks the so-called “spirit of Mumbai,” if there ever was one, can bear before it breaks. Of course, the most tragic aspect of the attack remains that it came as no surprise, at least to those who were observing the situation closely.

While no one could have predicted where exactly the attack would be and on what date, given the developments of the last two years gave a clear indication that a major attack is coming somewhere in the middle of 2011. In fact, we provided this risk assessment regularly to public and the government, to be ignored regularly. Worse yet, if this attack receives the same apathetic response that was given to the previous indicators, we can expect more and bigger attacks on other major cities by the year’s end . 

The meaningless ritual of Terrorism

We as South Asian people have a thing for rituals. Be it religion or society or governance, we have an uncanny ability to distill a legitimate process into a rite devoid of any semblance of meaning or purpose that we continue to faithfully follow eternally without ever questioning its efficacy. Bollywood churns out movies based on the same formula, government follows the same archaic rules written a century ago and housewives, across the country, wake up every day at four in the morning to water their Tulsi plants, the sole symbol of vegetation in their household. 

Now, it seems, terrorism has also become a meaningless ritual, a theatrical performance where everyone faithfully acts out his or her role, disregarding any possibility that the whole exercise may be pointless. 

In this theatre, we all know our roles. The terrorists need to kill random people in a random city. The government needs to be unapologetically apathetic. Media needs to be outraged and jingoistic. Politicians need to resign, safe in the knowledge that they would be absorbed back into the government soon enough. Civil society needs to celebrate the artificial notion of the “Mumbai spirit”. Hotels and multiplexes need to start half-heartedly body searching their patrons again. As for the people, unfortunately, their role is simply to die.

As for the usefulness of this theatre, if there is any, it was lost long ago in the ashes of few first bombs that killed innocents in India. What does anyone gain out of all this? 

6 Suggestions to Hindu Terrorists

Last night I ended up reading the Mumbai Police chargesheet on Abhinav Bharat (the Hindu terror group responsible for various blasts across India), the forensic report (what passes for night-time reading in my life) and Aseemanand’s (one of the Abhinav Bharat member) hand-written confession in Hindi (thanks to ER for fishing it out for me). After digesting all this information I have decided to...wait for it...convert my religion to Presbyterian Church of East Africa. The reason: I demand my religion, nay deserve my religion, to be represented a better class of terrorists. Seriously, Islam get Al Qaeda, Christianity gets IRA and Hinduism gets these monkeys? I would rather go with Somalian Pirates (East African Church kind)

The only time I will get to use Abhinav Bharat and masterminds in the same sentence is when saying, “Abhinav Bharat is to masterminds like velociraptor is to friendly pet.” While I am opposed to terrorism and violence, I am more vehemently opposed to stupidity. Hence, I am forthwith dispensing six pieces of advice to any Hindu out there aspiring to be a terrorist. Please heed to my advice or pretty much don’t blow up stuff, although preferably the latter:

Monday Backgrounder: Terrorism is a Tough Business

As mentioned before, Monday Backgrounder is a weekly feature of Dreams of a Typewriter (DoT) that lays out the basic information about a recent issue. With everyone going crazy over the UPS Terror Plot, this Backgrounder ponders over the difficulties of being a terrorist and why do they fail so often.

In the last few months we have seen one after another failed attempts of terrorist attacks - the attempted bombing of New York Time Square, the attack on Jama Masjid in October (which was foiled by a stone-throwing rickshaw driver) and who can forget the memorable underwear bomber. These stories don't exactly fit with our mental image of evil geniuses with amazing amount of training, unlimited resources and single-minded efforts towards destruction. The reality is terrorist groups have just as much (if not more) lethargy, internal politics, lack of resources and psychological problems as any other organization in the world.

It is precisely for this reason that we have to stop looking at them as these alien powerful forces and start seeing them as they really are- weak, scared and sometimes highly ineffective loose groups. Only then can one stop fearing them and face them with confidence and courage.

Inefficiency

Terrorists are not efficient. If they were efficient, ambitious and goal-oriented workaholics, they would not have chosen this line of career. While many terrorists are from rich families and are well-read, acquiring a terror-izing (?) mindset requires a certain amount of alienation from society, a certain amount of failure in the past that fuels the disgruntlement. More often than not, this happens when the guy himself is not exactly keen on hard work and diligence. In addition, let's face it. MBAs are not exactly falling over themselves to join up Al Qaeda. There is a lot of mismanagement in this industry.

If you have received this memo, your performance has been
deemed unsatisfactory by the HR Department

Internal Politics

Like any other office, terrorist organizations are home to professional jealousy and fierce competition. Considering that their co-workers murder and blow up people for a living, most terrorist choose to resolve their professional dispute not by a stinker but by killing their competitor. Even the great Osama Bin Laden is not above a little office politics. It is strongly suspected that the original Al Qaeda was behind the information that led US forces to kill Al Qaeda in Iraq's leader Abu Musab al-Zarqawi. Both factions had had a falling out  some time ago.

Lack of Resources and Training

Terrorism is a sophisticated business and needs proper training and equipment. Although we may be convinced that Pakistan is flooding terrorists with the best guns and training, the reality is a little different. Many of the training camps consist of a couple of monkey bars and terrible living conditions. Terrorists are probably taught a fraction of combat training that a low-level army soldier anywhere in the world receives. And then there are the technical problems. Despite what movies would have you believe, making a bomb is a difficult job and making a bomb that does fancy stuff (like a time bomb) is harder still. 

Psychological Issues

And of course there are the psychological issues. Terrorists, unlike criminals, are not on their home ground. Imagine the 9/11 attackers who lived in the US for more than a year, constantly looking over their shoulders and knowing that they are on a suicide mission. Away from all those who have brainwashed their minds into believing that theirs is righteous course. You throw a party and ten people change their minds at the last moment. And these guys are not going to a party. They are going to kill someone and may be die in the process. So the psychological factors are of critical importance.

Given these factors, it is a surprise these guys don't fail more often.

Image Credit: http://www.jroller.com, http://www.wpclipart.com

Musharraf reveals terrible secrets...Nobody cares

Today, Pakistan's former military dictator President Pervez Musharraf revealed a shocking secret, admitting that Pakistani Government was involved in training of terrorists operating in India! The statement which caught the attention of everyone for all of two minutes evoked the sarcastic remarks like "oh really?" and "we had no idea."

In the past month, Musharraf has made several other revelations including the possibility of a coup in Pakistan and the secret deal that he had made with Bhutto drop the charges against her husband, Zardari, while he was in power. All these revelations have made a very small dent in the public consciousness primarily because everyone already knew about them.

Why does the ex-general suddenly feel so chatty? A fortnight ago, Musharraf announced his plans to launch a political party in Pakistan based on the overwhelming response he has received from his followers on Facebook (*snicker*). Since then almost everyone in Pakistani politics including low profile politicians have written him off. Moreover, the media (especially the South Asian media) is practically showing no interest in his vision for the Pakistani political future. Hence, the strategy to grab headlines. 

May be someone should mention to him that until his shocking revelations give out more information that my barber, nobody would care.

Image Source: Wikimedia

Update: A new Bin Laden video released!

Just a quick update. Osama Bin Laden has released a new video criticizing the Muslim countries for spending more on their military than their citizens. May be in his old age OBL is turning into a commie...lol. The authenticity of the video has not been verified as of yet.

Fear them not

Probably the most insightful aspect of the mysterious Jama Masjid attacks (19 September 2010) is actions of 26-year-old Salim Ahmed, the rickshaw-wala who started throwing stones at the two attackers. While the confusion over why or what the Sunday shoot-out was, one thing that struck me was the immediate reaction of Ahmed, and to be fair, the constable present at the scene. Their actions foiled the attack and saved lives. Put this in contrast to the massive panic that ensued after Mumbai Terror Attacks of 2008.
I hope what happened at Jama Masjid on Sunday is not a one-time event but sign of changing attitude of the Indian public. The only true way to counter terror is not through putting a cop with a Kalashnikov at every corner, listening to all the phone calls ever made and arresting everyone we don’t like (which are only stop-gap solutions) but to refuse to be terrorized. Terrorism, like crime, is something we may very well have to live with. The threat of terrorism can never be removed, only lessened.
In general terrorist acts are followed panic and anger by the victims –Indian society and government. In anger we overreact, lash out on innocents, only strengthening extremist’s hand. In panic, we accede to their demands and give into injustice.
The overreaction to terror attacks in India can be often seen in the aftermath when the police rounds up scores of Muslims for “questioning” or shutting down entire cities of Kashmir and Northeast. Moreover, the call for blood by the public can lead to terrible consequences, as was evident in the post-Mumbai Terror Attacks India when the entire nation was up in arms asking for war against Pakistan.
The panic can be seen when the people into terrorists’ demands. Recent studies  have shown that terrorism often pays off for the extremist groups and is therefore employed. For instance, the foremost demand of Al Qaida after 9/11 was the removal of US troops from Saudi Arabia and believe it or not, today there are no US troops in Saudi Arabia.
Hopefully, now the Indian society is learning not to be completely paralyzed by fear or lash out too strongly but to deal with terrorism rationally.

Image: Jama Masjid  Image Credit:Wikimedia